welcome to
epiphany

What is epiphany?
Luxe. Opulent. Chic. Exclusive.
Have you ever relaxed so fucking hard that you forgot you had a Siamese twin?
Have you ever sucked so much steam into those nubile lungs that Don Waylon the Crimson came haunting out yer pores? Did he ne’er leave you since?
Did you ever wonder where Spencer earned the nickname “Original Salt Boy”?
Have you ever dropped your [bubbly] in a [hottub]?
Yeah? Then this is the party for you.

Uh…what is epiphany?
An after-hours, private spa party.
Hot water? Steam room? Cold plunge? Salt scrub? Sauna? You got it.
Politely muffled voices? Ambient techno? Crudité and bubbly? Mm-hmm...

Holy cow, fun! Where is it? And when?
December 20, 2024 - 8PM - 11PM
Watershed Spa - 514 2nd St. SE, Minneapolis, MN 55414
(festivities to follow, at B & A’s house - it’s “optional”)

Can I bring anyone else?
Sorry. This is the only party we've ever thrown that is invite-only (because there’s a space limit, not because we’re dickheads). Because there’s limited space, please RSVP!

Holy moly! Isn’t 12/20 Andrew’s birthday?
YUP. But that’s just coincidental. Tributes neither required nor expected.
